Monday, 14 August 2017

Extract of my Travel Diary #2

Day: 13 Aug 2017
Location: Porto, Portugal 
Time: 4:37 a.m

"It's almost almost 5 a.m and I can't sleep. Partially, because I am doing this night shift at this hostel where I part time. Traveling on a student budget calls for these gigs, which I enjoy. It teaches me what camp was supposed to teach me and I have never been to camp during my childhood. I try my best to learn how to adult, by that I mean do my groceries, budget my money, cook my meals, clean my mess and finally understand how to use a washing machine without panicking.

So far, I feel like I am doing a terrible job.
Somehow , I have been pampered by my life that I am forgetting the basis of survival. I use the pretext of being only 20 years old which in my culture means you're still a baby doing her first steps. Failure is expected and bruises are anticipated.
Not long ago, I had enough of solo traveling. I headed to the door of the apartment I share with seven other people and sat in a Café in Galleria De Paris. I spent hours of frustrations writing in my travel diary stuttering words and unfinished sentences.
I am trying to put my finger on the problem.
A problem I call: WHAT-THE-HELL-IS-WRONG-WITH-YOU
I have my doubts. These little monsters have a habit to resurface from the artificial facade coated with breath taking Instagram pictures when none's watching.
I read an article about types of travellers. I had to reluctantly admit to myself I fall within the category of Escapists.
We love to think we are stepping out of our comfort zone when traveling.
"Step out of your comfort zone"
 It is a frequent catchphrase used by travel's agencies marketing department and an equally used expression by travel bloggger selling the dream to students drowning in loans or adult working in cubicles. Yet, sometimes the reality is that we won't face what is happening back home or we simply haven't found a place to call home.
It is not a bad thing. On the contrary, I think it's a healthy decision. It gives you times to think and put things into perspective. It makes you share your bread with people you would never glance over twice. It obligates you to face your demons on the road. It gives you a reason to wake up in the morning.
Solo travel is not always spirit-lifting and inspiring. There are times when it's soul-crushing and lonely.
I recall times where I didn't interact with anyone (that isn't in the service industry) for two days. When I finally had to use my voice to converse with people, it was rusty and weird.
As I said, I have doubts but I never regretted any of the steps I took no matter how far they propel me in the unknown. "

With love,
Ouej

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